Nothing new.
The world is still on fire and
I'm still not ok.

Living on borrowed time
with borrowed bones
chasing bedsheets, bumps, and
bourbon.

I still fall in love so deeply
that I can hardly
breathe.

I'm still terrified of how
everything makes me
feel.
(You know what I mean)

I eat sleep aids like tic tacs
so I spend less time
telling people how much they mean or
what I want
to do to
them.

I've vomited vices but still never found
the dreams I swallowed when
Josh and
my unborn child
died too
soon.

I still think of dying
more than I'd like to
admit.
But people are liars and
so am
I.

Just another day in paradise
living the dream and
surviving the
nightmare.